Sunday, March 08, 2009

The Economy of Sin

Is there an economy of sin? Is there an economy in sin?

I mean aside from the obvious inference, whereby an individual could possibly cut back on or economize their own indulgence in sin and thereby see a reduction in their monthly expenses. I mean, is there really a here to for undiscovered economy in sin? Just waiting to be harvested? A place where we can as a society retreat to and find the holy grail and saving grace of our economic revival all wrapped up in one? One might seem to think so based on the suggested legal and policy revisions of the past several weeks being proposed by elected officials all across America.

You have to hand it to them thought, when times get rough? Where is the first place they always go? (tobacco and alcohol).

With the current recession, economic downturn or depression
(depending on how you view this disaster) it suddenly appears that there may very well be a path to salvation for all of us. And it may be found in the most unlikely of places. That's right friends and neighbors! All that may be required to save us all? Is the further turning away from our moral sensibilities and an open embrace and admitting to the things that we all know will lead to more health and more prosperity for us all. Especially as it concerns our treasuries.

We simply need to reevaluate our moral positions a bit and tweak our existing human weaknesses to our best advantage. And suddenly? We will once again be transformed from despair and disillusionment and placed rightly back in control of our future and back on a path to a collective and prosperous destiny. It's all only a matter of identifying and tapping into the sins of others and then taxing them for all that they are truly worth.

Or at least it would seem to be that simple, based upon many recent recommendations for law and tax changes being submitted and proposed by many politicians and elected officials all across the country.

Some relatively simple self improvement taxation models are obvious like alcohol and tobacco, but there are others. And what better and more reliable wells of sin tax could there possibly be than those two? Well, it seems that we as a nation may have in our haste to squeeze everything that we could from the sins of alcohol and tobacco, overlooked and neglected the reality that you can at the least always go up on the taxes on alcohol and tobacco. There is a start!

Hence the recent 61 cent federal tax increase on cigarettes as an example. This nifty little tax boost will like all others, provide gazillions of more dollars for (wait for it) children health care. There, see how simple that was! Just a stroke of the pen and a few slaps on the back and we suddenly have a means of funding children's health care. All that is needed is for their parents to keep lighting up and knocking back the six packs. Cannot the same be done for beer and wine and liquor and Sunday sales? See! There is just another example of the money that we are allowing to slip away by not being reasonable about all this. WE must intervene in these bible belt states and show them the light. As their lack of depravity is depriving everyone else of the bountiful harvest of blessed revenue.

I know, alcohol and tobacco have already been taxed fairly extensively, but remember the formula illustrated above. All that is required to justify a tax substantial increase on anything, is a just cause. And how much more just can we presently be, than by trying to pull our collective fat out of the fire by creative taxation (I mean financing!) It's only a matter of voting on new sin tax increases and signing them into law folks. And there is a veritable plethora of un-mined sin taxes that have never been explored! And besides, the quantitative involved, is all "those other people" who engage in such things anyway. It won't affect the majority of "us" in the middle class.

So far, we as a nation have always tapped into and depended on the minor league sins for our vexing and ongoing attempts to tax our morality and fund our Utopian brand of socialism. But in doing so? We have left the mother load of all sins and their potential taxes untapped and languishing below the surface in a sub culture economy that has escaped us.

And as a few of our more astute politicians have recently recognized? We need to do something about that. And we need to do something about it right now! Things are bad and they are getting worse by the day! While here we sit, with the obvious cure to our economic cancer and we are letting the very life blood of our continued existence, flow right past us without reaping it's life saving benefits.

Of what am I speaking? Well certainly not of the Governor of New York's tax proposals of taxing mere sugary sodas. Oh no! we must look a bit beyond taxing Cokes and fries if we want to successfully march back to our heydays of prosperity. (we can tax those too, but right now, we have bigger fish to bake, as frying isn't good for us). But we can certainly explore taxing fat people at a later date.

Right now we need some real sin taxes on some real sins for a change! We need to legalize and tax marijuana for starters! There's a gold mine of tax just waiting to be harvested! So why let the Mexican and Colombian drug cartels and the American drug gangs have all the fun and financial benefit.

And once we have that all rolling (no pun intended), we can up the anty and go for the gusto and legalize and tax the rest of the drug realm! We can legalize cocaine and heroin and meth and Valium and Oxycontin and anything and everything that even remotely is legal or illegal and capable of producing an altered state of mind.

And don't forget prostitution! What better gateway path to the other sins of the flesh, than the simple revelation that sex for sale is a good thing. Just as long as it is properly taxed for the benefit of all Americans (and our children. Never leave out the children). Marijuana can be and has been a gateway drug to bigger and better and more potent forms of pharmaceutical entertainment for ages. So too can prostitution fulfill our every sexual need and desire as a pathway to other sexual exploits. From pedophilia to necrophilia, just as long as we tax it for the good of mankind? Or ostensibly earmark the funds for our youth? What could possibly be wrong with a tax plan like that?

So you see, the possibilities are almost endless. And it makes me almost giddy with anticipation of thought, over what can be reaped and benefited from simply expanding our horizons. And all that is needed to return this great nation to the days of truth, justice and the American way? Is nothing more than a little retooling of the moral thinking and some managed punishment of the indulgence in our society.

And besides....the way I look at it is like this. If the democrat socialist liberals guided by Obama, Pelosi and Reid, can become the three Musketeers of social change? And they can use as their platform and justification, that the evil rich only need to be made to pay their fair share? Then what the hell!

I believe that we can raise as much money and more, from just corralling our crop of degenerates and those others who indulge and imbibe in the finer and lesser sins of the flesh and of the mind.

Think about that for a minute. The difference in potential revenue has got to be mind boggling. If we just taxed the smokers and the drinkers and the dope heads and the perverts of our nation? The rest of us could live plentiful and productive lives without a care in the world. Therefore, I say we take them like the fattened and disgusting little aphids that they are and farm them for their own disgusting indulgences.

After all, ants do it. And considering our current social structure of society and government, what makes us so different from ants anyway.

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